It is time again for my weekly denial... 


I've not come to really love these...

I am not currently hiding on the computer so that I don't have to answer my step dad's same question for the 12th time. Even though I know he can't help this I do not let it start to get on my nerves from time to time.  I do not fantasize about bumping him like you do a record with a skip to move on to the next topic...

I do not take it personal when I  make him exactly what he asks for for dinner even though it involves running to two stores to get the needed ingredients and then he won't eat it, because he "never" liked it....

It does not make me want to cry when he thinks I'm my mom, or doesn't know where he is...

I do not think very unchristian thoughts when my brother calls and dosen't ask how he can help, but wants to know if our parents kept something of his from his childhood and can I mail it to him... or when one of my FIVE step-siblings who all live within four hours of here and were no help in this crisis that brought us here from 1000 miles away drop by for a 30 minute visit or send flowers and my step-dad spends the rest of the day talking about what great "kids" they are...

I am still glad I came...

Thanks for listening,

I'm Sorry...

I didn't mean to disapear on everyone...

I'm not sure anyone is still out there to read this, it's been so long since I posted. When I started my blog, my goal was a new post every week day and to try to be amusing at least once a week... Well, I don't feel very amusing these days... I mostly feel physically and emotionally drained. You know the old saying "If you don't have anything nice to say, then say nothing at all?" Well, my blogging credo was something like this: "If you can't be amusing, uplifting or at least positive, don't post." I know I haven't always kept to that, but I have tried... Based on that credo I shouldn't even be posting now, but here goes...

We made it to Maine safe and sound. The Girlies and I hit the ground running as full time care givers to my step-dad (who has Alzheimer's). He is a great guy, but the past week has been exhausting... I don't want to bury you with all the gory details but it has been a lot to handle... I don't know how my mom has done it all these years, because I am drained. My mom is currently in a nursing home recovering from her latest issues and may be home in about another week and half or so. In some ways I look forward to that, so she can deal with him, but in others I dread it as I know my work in some ways will double. I miss the Axeman very much... He is back in TN wrapping things up, and I could really use his quiet strength right now.


We have had computer & internet trouble so I can't post any pictures... but suffice it to say... we have moved into a post card...It has been beautiful here it is almost unreal... I think the Lord is reminding me of his presence everywhere.

I am working on resolving the computer issues as I type this, so hopefully soon I can share the upside of moving to Maine with y'all... As for the stress... I am really trying to find balance... I need to find a church and get in touch with some old friends here make some  new friends. I am surrounded by my mom's friends, which is some what helpful, but their first allegiance is to her (as I'd expect it to be), so everything is "reported back"... Not extremely helpful for someone like me who needs to "vent" from time to time...


There are funny stories to tell, but I need some perspective to properly tell them... Thanks for hanging in there y'all!

& Thanks for listening,

It is what it is....

The Girlies & I are leaving for Maine in two days. I am still tying up all the graduation loose ends... when I was so crazy busy with the planning of the graduation I kept telling myself that as soon as it was over I'd be able to rest... Alas I am way more busy now... We are flying up and I am staying two and a half weeks then leaving the Girlies there to come back for a few days to help the Axeman move us. I am trying to pack and visit with people, but goodbyes are getting to me. I want to see everyone, but I am so busy and my emotions are on edge... It is what it is....

I want to be sharing the graduation with you right now, but I don't have time to upload and edit pictures. Not only that, but I still haven't had time to process how I feel about my first born graduating. I homeschooled her for ten of her 12+ years of education.... I was a daily part of this process, and I feel like the stress over my Mother's situation has over-shadowed this special time. I am ashamed to admit it, but I am angry with her for taking this special time from me and my family. I know she had no control over her illness (or little anyhow) but I am angry all the same.... It is what it is...

She doesn't get it... She thinks I should be excited.... I am saying goodbye to friends, and leaving things I love.... I helped start a homeschool teen group here and I love those kids... They are one of the great joys in my life... Other moms are stepping up to keep things going, and this gives me great joy. That being said, I don't want to say goodbye to these kiddos... I am not excited about this move. Don't get me wrong, I am not resentful, but I am not excited... I may need an attitude adjustment, but I don't want one... I want to be happy for Cate... to savior the excitement of this moment... this achievement of both of ours... Instead I am sad... It is what it is...

Here is a couple peeks at Cate's big day....

(Photo: Rose Zepeda)

Here she is just before marching in...

See how happy she is....

(Photo: Laura Allen)

Here is the crowd just before... Pretty good turnout for five graduates...

(Photo: Missy Holyrod)

I am reading a letter we wrote to Cate just before the Axeman & I give her the diploma.

(Photo: Rose Zepeda)

Here is her Senior Portrait...

Below are the pictures we used on her announcement...

(Photos: Rese Zepeda)

Her origional photo date was scheduled during our emergency visit to Maine in April... We rescheduled it for May 1st... The day of the flood.... (Aghhhhh.....) So she ended up getting these taken the last Thursday... Yes, two day before graduation... Our photographer went home and started editing and had the portrait ready foe me to put in the bulletin later that day... She was amazing... Poor Cate... It was like 90 degrees and really humid, but I still think they turned out beautiful.

Oh... and Sparky had a formal "Sweet 16" party Friday night, so I had to alter a dress for her... I have some fun pictures of her in it, but for now here is a peek if her with the birthday girl...

Oh... she got a new haircut too...

Cute huh?

Thanks for listening,

Not Me Monday...

Here is is... time again for my weekly denial....

I was not so busy and stressed this weekend I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown.

I did not let this stress effect how much I enjoyed my sweet Cate's graduation...

I did not completely forget to take even one picture at her party...

The party that I did not totally order way too much food for...

I did not then only make five minute appearances at the next two party's to drop off the food I said I'd bring and a card.

Sunday I did not nap during the sermon on "graduate appreciation" Sunday...

Not I, mom of one of the two graduates....

I did not bring left over food from the party to our homeschool co-op end of the year party later that afternoon.

I have not had three extra large, $4.00 coffees to get through today.

I am not now currently watching cartoons rather then doing something productive even though I am moving in a weeks time.

I am not keeping this post short so I can focus on Perry the Platypus...

Thanks for listening,

Post it Tuesday...

Once again on the wrong day...

I'm a rebel, what can I say?

Thanks for listening,

Not Me Monday...

This picture does not make me want to cry....

Nope, not me...

This Saturday I will not be a blubbering mess....

I am not one of those moms...

Thanks for listening,

Happy Mother's Day...

To my dear, sweet friends...

Happy Mother's Day to you...

If you are reading this, I hope it's because what you wanted today was to be left alone for a few hours of blogging... If that is true... Yea you!

I hope you didn't have to cook a meal or do house work today...

Yea you!!

I hope that you didn't have to make a 9 PM run to the grocery store because your husband forgot to buy anything to grill after he said that was his plan... and then when he was dictating the list to you he didn't say "Oh and add whatever you need to make your potato salad." And when you question if he plans to make it he says.. "Oh, I thought you would.." And when you inform him the would be cooking on mother's day... the one thing you didn't want to do... I also hope at this point in the conversation he didn't answer you flippantly, "Well... make it tonight, so you won't have to cook tomorrow."

Oh... your husband didn't...

Well, Yea you...

I'm off to the store...

Thanks for listening,

Five Favorites Friday... Graduaton Edition (part duex)

I had all kinds of ideas for this post... I still have lots I want to share about the flood, but couldn't figure out a "Five Favorites" to do about it yet... Mother's Day is Sunday, but it turns out that Graduation trumps Mother's Day this year... Yes, you heard me right... I am currently up to my eyeballs in graduation details, and high school graduations only happen once, but I get annual shots at Mather's Day. So tune back in one year from today for all my amazing ideas for gifts for moms... Today you will have to settle for my so-so graduation gifts ideas... Why so-so you ask... Because, let's face it, graduates do not want gifts...

They want cash...

They will settle for gifts that require keys and have internal combustion engines, but since my last name is not Trump or Gates that is outta the question.
That being said, there are still many of you out there who wish to give gifts, so here are five more suggestions...

1. Oh The Places You'll Go... By Dr. Seuss

A classic... and Amazon.com has this cute gift set that includes a bunch of cute Dr. Seuss tchotchkes... magnets, photo frame, book mark, etc...

2. Cool Re-Useable Water Bottle Sets...

This one for the gals...

or this one for the guys...

I found these on Amazon.com too....

That place really is a treasure trove of gift ideas...

3. "Of The Month" Clubs...

The gifts that keep on giving....

And there are so many to choose from...

like these...

Ice Cream of the Month Club...

YUM...

Who wouldn't want this??? (I guess those who are allergic... but otherwise...) You could set it up to start delivering to their dorm in the fall.. although my college had all you can eat soft-serve in the dining hall....So you might want to consider...

Coffee of the month clubs...

There are a lot of "clubs" out there, but Starbucks has an "subscription delivery" program that allows you to pay month to month, and start and stop whenever you want... How fun would it be to receive a cute mug (like the one above) with a note inside promising their favorite coffee every month of their first year of college? If that idea doesn't work for you, you could get them a gift card... register it online in your name and recharge it every month for them... how fun would that be? Even $7 a month would be the promise of one fancy coffee drink and pastry per month... They would look forward to their recharge day... I guarantee it...

This ONE is for the guys....

LOL...

4. Gifts for Guys...

Alright... Calm down folks...

 I heard you...

Gifts specifically for guys... I don't know what the big deal is... They are so easy to shop for... They want the same thing the gals do... CASH... Not helpful?... Ok, so here is the secret to shopping for teen guys...

Find out their favorite movie, tv show, or comic (excuse me... Graphic Novel..) and buy them something related to that...

Like this watch for the Transformers Fan...

Or this cookie jar for the Star Wars fan...

How cool would this look in a dorm room?

Your graduate a Trekkie? How about this mug...

This would go well with the "coffee" idea above... I just realised I have a lot of beverage related gifts... I don't know what to make of this... Just an observation...

One more guy idea 

A Battlestar Galactica Toaster...

Trust me... this is funny... (and useful too... bonus!)

These gifts are good for "geeky girls" for that matter... and that is not an insult... "Geek" isn't an insult anymore... It is a title, proudly worn by those who embrace all things geek... I'd know... I am one.. It skipped a generation, so don't get any of this stuff for Cate... (I wouldn't mind the toaster for me though...)

Your guy not a "geek"...Then look to classic rock items... or NASCAR... (I don't get it, but their fans sure do...) or Sports Team stuff... I know for a fact they have NFL mini fridges! I don't know why, but that made me laugh... If this "guy" list doesn't help, give up... Give them cash... Remember, it's what they really want anyhow!

Before I share gift number five, I need to swear you to secrecy... This is Cate's actual gift from us... She won't actually receive it on her graduation as her party is going to set us back a little. We gave her a choice... No party, just go out to lunch and get her gift now or party and get her gift in August... She is a smart girl... She chose party now, gift later... That way she gets her cake and can eat it too... Literally, I guess... So, I hereby swear you to secrecy...

5. Tiffany & Co. Necklace

She has had her eye on this necklace from Tiffany & Co. for years...

Since her Lizzy Maguire days..

She has drooled over it for years... She strongly suspects we will be getting this for her, but she also thinks she might just be getting the bracelet that looks like it, since it is about a third of the price. But we have been setting aside a little bit each payday for her to have it...Remember... Shhhhhh...I am serious... I will hunt you down like a dog if you spoil this for us...

Love ya...

I hope this is helpful to someone...

Thanks for listening,